Nov 19, 2005

It's the little things in Life

I'm sure I heard Michael Caine say it in a film somehwere. I can hear him in his cockney accent: It's da littuhl fings in loife, aint it?

I have been a malcontent a good portion of my life. Looking forward with angst and back with regret. If only, if only ... when I get this, when I get that. Why don't I have this? Why did I ever do that? And here's a bad idea: asking yourself big life questions after 11pm. This is when the TV runs ads for fast food and cars and sleep aids. When we want to avoid, stuff, forget. When we want to gather round the good stuff.

After a couple years of heartache, shame, embarrassment and disappointment, I had nothing to count but those little things. A good long sleep. A room clean from dust. Good coffee. Getting regular. The calm after 90 minutes of kick ass yoga. And then the other things. My apartment. After two years of gypsy living I'm now in a spectacular guest house. Paying rent to a couple much younger than I. I have one of those cats that is friendly and likes to be around people. And speaking of people. I have amazing friends. A group of casual friends I feel proud to know, and a smaller handful of close friends I feel blessed to be loved by.

My sister just called to remind me that turkeys are really cheap at the grocery store right now. They lure you in with free turkeys to get you to buy the stuffing and the baster. I just want the turkey. A 12 pound turkey for five bucks in my freezer is a simple pleasure. So is the blessing of having a sister who calls me on tips.

Here's a few other things I've come to respect: Half-decaf coffee. Cheese made with goat's milk (my allergies are less). And here's one you might not know. Bring your car to the brand dealership, show them your VIN number and proof of ID, and they look up the code and cut you a brand new original key. No more OSH knockoffs that can't even open your glove box.

One last thing. Winter light in the morning. Love that.

All of these little things add up to one really big thing: a glimpse at contentment.